Man of the Week:

Jesus Christ

Santa Claus is a close second, but he wouldn’t be here without the son of God himself; Jesus walked (on water) so Santa could fly. Remembering why we celly makes the day that much better and special.

Woman of the Week:

Mrs. Claus

“Behind every great man, there is a great woman”. Mrs. Claus embraces #TradWife life, helping operations run smoothly in the North Pole by supporting her mans and keeping morale high amongst the elves (until Netflix gets the rights to her)

Honorable Mentions: Mariah Carey, Sydney Sweeney’s Mom

Matrix L of the Week:

Epstein clients list is set to drop

Justice baby, justice. I bet my house and my firstborn son on a Bill Clinton / Prince Andrew parlay.

Santa of the Week:

Mr. Beast

Mr. Beast rescued 100 dogs off the street, gave them week full of fun and play, and then got each one of them adopted. Mr. Beast using his powers for good with this one.

Grinch of the Week:

Elijah Pritchett

Alabama OL, Elijah Pritchett, is under fire for knowingly giving a girl an STD. He could face up to 3 months in jail or pay fines of up to $500 (feel like theres a clear winner there…)

Regardless, spread Christmas cheer, not STDs.

Brb, gonna go put that on a t-shirt.

Gift of the Week:

The Nelk Boys helicopter Tucker Carlson the world’s largest tin of Zyn

Are you okay babe? You barely touched your 10 foot / 300 pound tin of Zyn

Christmas Bar of the Week:

Pete’s Tavern (Gramercy)

Seems to be the consensus premiere Christmas bar. Normalize going out on Christmas night, bring the grandparents.

Christmas Fit of the Week:

CJ Mosely

Honorable Mention: Adam Thielen’s grinch cleats

Text of the Week:

*5 minutes later*

To my FBI agent: this was just a joke please do not send in the SWAT team

Naughty or Nice:

White Elephant

For those who don’t know, the basic premise of White Elephant is that each person buys a gift within a certain budget and puts it in the pile. Each person then blindly picks one, the catch being that people can bi-pass their turn to steal a gift that has already been opened.

Hoss: Fun, interactive game that keeps people on their toes and excited.

Toss: Can be a major buzzkill to pull a gift that you really love only for it to be swiped by Janice in HR who thinks it’s a perfect gift for her nephew who she hasn’t bought a gift for yet.

What do you think?

Fantasy Championship Advice:

Congratulations: You’ve made it farther than the rest of your league and hopefully some money comes with that on the chance that you don’t finish the job. But here are a few bits of advice that might just give you that edge you need:

-If your opponent has a big-time QB, start receivers on his team if you have them, or add one off of waivers if it makes sense. Receiving touchdowns are worth more than passing touchdowns in most leagues, so if you have the chance to offset say a Dak Prescott TD via Brandin Cooks, it might be worth it to consider.

-Play the game, not the season. It doesn’t matter what they’ve done all year, what matters is this one game. Have a big name who’s fallen cold (cough cough Stefon Diggs) or is up against a big matchup? Don’t be afraid to bench them in favor of a guy who’s heating up.

-Cuck your opponents waiver wire. Just because you might not need a hot waiver pick this week, doesn’t mean your opponent won’t. Notice a weak spot in their lineup or an injury? Snag their potential replacement before they can and watch them cry about it in your DMs.

Merry Fantasy Championship, and may the odds ever be in your favor 🏆️ 

Random Athlete Generator:

Nate Robinson

Jersey of the Week:

New Jersey Devils green and red

DAWG of the Week:

Micah Shrewsberry (Notre Dame HC)

“If you don't play hard, you'll rot on the bench. I'll help you transfer” - Micah Shrewsberry after losing by 20 to Citadel. DAWG. 

Who You Got?:

There’s been a lot of talk lately that Rudolph is a systems reindeer and only thrives because of his supporting cast of weapons, but I would like to dispute that: when the game was on the line that one foggy night, who stepped up? Who led the charge when these “weapons” backed down from the challenge? While Rudolph might not put up Blitzen or Comet numbers, in crunch time situations, he delivers, and that is exactly who you want leading your sleigh.

That said, -2500 is ridiculous. I’m taking Dasher at +700.

Christmas Movie of the Week:

Elf (2003)

I’m not sure this movie needs any introduction. It finds the perfect balance between funny and heartwarming, a classic for both parents and children alike.

Christmas Movie Quote of the Week:

“Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere, leave you for dead? – Clark Griswold (Christmas Vacation, 1989)

Christmas Song of the Week:

Saint Brick Intro by Gucci Mane (2016)

Wellness Tip of the Week:

Meditate

Recent studies have offered promising results about the impact of meditation in reducing blood pressure. There is also evidence that it can help people manage insomnia, depression and anxiety.  Some research suggests that meditation physically changes the brain and could help:  increase ability to process information slow the cognitive effects of aging reduce inflammation support the immune system reduce symptoms of menopause control the brain’s response to pain improve sleep - The Yellow King

I hate the term meditating cuz it sounds so granola, let’s all agree to call it “lifting brain-weights” from now on.

Wisdom of the Week:

Sunday Motivation:

Only fitting that we feature Christian icon, Tim Tebow.

(Credit: The Yellow King)

Fan of the Week:

Cole Bement

Q: What is your favorite Christmas tradition and why?

Bement: Traditions have always been a huge part of my family's way of celebrating Christmas. We always go out to dinner, followed by a trip to Longwood Gardens to enjoy the light displays/ fountain shows. We also go to a Flyers game every year, which is a fun way for us to get into the city

Fan Question of the Week:

What is your favorite Dominoes order and what is one thing you will never order from them again?

Asked by: The Yellow King

Great question, Mr. King. The below picture is in honor of my birthday in which we ordered obscene amount of Dom’s and watched Josh Allen tear up my fantasy team. Here’s what I got for you…

Favorite order:

-Small Pizza, half-cheese, half-pineapple
-Mango habanero wings
-Chicken jalapeño sandwich
-Parmesan bread bites
-Cinna Stix

One thing I’ll never order again:

-Cheesy bread. Not because it isn’t absolute fire, but if I’m going to splurge, it’s far too redundant to waste the calories/stomach space; it’s just too close to pizza.

The Mav Cam:

Leaderboard:

Totals reset at the end of each month

and a Meme for the Road: