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Win of the Week:

Toys ‘R’ Us makes comeback

6 years after going bankrupt, the company that helped forged our childhoods has opened up 24 stores across the US. Does this mean that the kids are putting down their iPads and playing with physical toys again? Maybe, maybe not. But it does warm my heart know that some kids will experience the same thrill and joy of walking into a Toys ‘R’ Us that we did when we were just wee lads and lasses…

Loss of the Week:

The animals at Carlos Rodon’s local shelter

Yankee’s pitcher Carlos Rodon pledged to donate $10,000 to a local animal shelter for every strikeout he made against the Royals. This was his final stat line:

Ouch.

We can pick up some slack for him though. Click here to donate to Best Friends Animal Society if you’re feeling generous. Their mission is to end killing in all animal shelters by 2025.

Matrix W of the Week:

Emergency Alert absolutely POSTERIZES the Amish

After Wednesday’s nationwide Emergency Alert, many member of the Amish community were exposed for owning cell phones. Those notifications are annoying enough, imagine being kicked out of your West Village apartment with all your friends because of one of them? Sheesh. Cold world.

Matrix L of the Week:

Aaron Rodgers and Pat McAfee vax shenanigans Pt 2

ESPN let a wolf into their henhouse when they gave Pat McAfee his own show, and boy is he eatin’…. never change boys.

Man of the Week:

Will Ferrell

“That Will Ferrell set at Delta went craaaaazy last night” is not a sentence I had on my Bingo card for this year… but never forgetting where you came from? Hoss move.

I also love that, with one of the most iconic actors of our generation standing 2 feet behind him, buddy over here is still locked in and trying to cook.

Clown of the Week:

Kylie Jenner

This is the image that Kylie Jenner removed from her instagram story after receiving backlash.

I am so sorry to the members of the Hamas community that read this newsletter, but here we think that people who bend to the .1% of the social media mob are cowards, especially in the face of what is an objective tragedy. I don’t necessarily rely on Kylie for my geopolitical takes, but I do expect better.

Date Spot of the Week:

Refinery Rooftop (LWS)

Cuisine: Cocktails, brunch
Pro’s: Great menu, nice space
Con’s: A bit loud
Good for Date #: 5+
Secret Sauce: Great for a brunch date to mix things up with someone you already have a rapport with. Can also bring the squad and make it a group thing

Fit of the Week:

David Njoku

Okay so this might be my Halloween costume this year: it’s both scary, swaggy, and “culturally relevant”. What an absolute beast. He may be having an overwhelmingly disappointing season, but at least he looks like a bad ass while doing it.

Did You Know?:

If you follow a consistent routine, dogs can predict what time you are coming home based on the amount of your scent left in the house at a given time.

Random Athlete Generator:

Dontrelle Willis

Jersey of the Week:

Nigeria National Team Jersey, 2018-2019

Hoss or Toss?:

NHL Frozen Frenzy

In an effort to boost viewership, the NHL will roll out their very own version of RedZone this October, where they will bounce from game to game, hoping to capture “every goal, every hit, and every power play.”

Let it be known that I myself am not a gigantic fan of NFL RedZone… I’ve always said that it was the porn compilation of professional sports: all cum shot, no buildup. You lose a lot with that model. But you cannot deny its success and popularity so I am clearly in the minority there. I am just not sure that this model works for such a bang bang sport like hockey, whose action is far harder to predict than football.

What do you think?

Movie of the Week:

Everybody Wants Some!! (2016)

This one goes out specifically to all my small private liberal arts school guys and gals. No film captures the essence of our college experience quite as accurately as this one does. From the banter, to the waking up at 11am with a beer in your hand, to the social dynamics, everything is 100% spot on.

Here are a few fun facts about the movie:

1. Director Richard Linklater went as far to call it a “spiritual sequel” to his 1993 hit, Dazed and Confused

   

   Dazed and Confused, the movie that put McConaughey on the map

2. Linklater shot the bulk of the movie in his actual fraternity house at Sam Houston State (it literally looks like 109, shoutout Bucknell)

3. It is titled after the 1980 Van Halen hit

4. I caught up with some of the guys in the movie over the phone a few weeks ago. They said that “rehearsal” consisted of dancing and baseball lessons, and that they spent the weeks leading up to the movie living in Linklater’s Austin ranch getting to know each other. It was apparently a Hell of a time as you can imagine

Movie Quote of the Week:

“Get busy living, or get busy dying”- Andy Dufresene

Song of the Week:

Going to California, Led Zepplin (1971)

From a band known for their hard rock, Going to California really showcases Led Zepplin’s range as a group. They don’t quite go full on The Carpenters with this one, but they certainly don’t sound like the band that gave us The Immigrant Song.

Meme of the Week:

Wellness Tip of the Week:

Stay warm in the winter months with morning cold exposure

Wisdom of the Week:

Sunday Motivation:

Hoss of the Week:

Rod Poma

Q: Would you rather fight 100 duck sized Jared Letos, or 1 Jared Leto sized duck?

Poma: I would have to to choose the 1 Jared Leto sized duck. Not because I think that I can beat the shit out of a giant duck, but because through the use of the power of friendship and tomfoolery, I believe that I could pacify this duck. Taking it one step further, I believe that I could establish diplomacy with this duck, and maybe eventually: friendship. His name would be Jared Ducko, he’d eventually go on to be the best man at my wedding, the godfather of my child, and just genuinely part of the family. The unfortunate side of having such a strong brotherhood is that it hurts when they’re gone. Mallard Ducks have a lifespan of 5-10 years. When Jared Ducko passed, it left a mallard shaped hole in my heart. If I could do it again, even if it meant going through the earth shattering pain of losing my best friend, I would fight that duck 110 times out of 100.

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